Cloth Diaper Week: Surprise Reveal!!!

Today is the BIG day!!! Seriously, I am so excited to be a part of this. I feel like we should have a drumroll...



Today is the day that Rock-a-Bums releases their PRINTS! I have been so excited about this day for so long! And to celebrate they are hosting a MASSIVE giveaway. Are you ready for this?

Rock-a-Bums is giving away a "From Birth to Potty Learning" stash of 9 covers (prints or solids, winners choice), 18 inserts, and 60 hybrid inserts.

If you have been considering cloth diapering, have a friend that wants to cloth diaper, or want a whole new stash (so basically EVERYONE) you need to enter! Tell your friends...this is something that just has to be shared it's so fun.

Head on over to their HUGE giveaway and then come back here for more info on why we big puffy heart Rock-A-Bums...don't worry...I'll wait...

Welcome back! Now let's go over some of the new features of the 2.0. We LOVED their 1.0 so you can bet the 2.0 is amazing.

FABRIC: It’s proprietary to Rock-a-Bums and is quick to wick away moisture and is hospital grade hypo allergenic. You guys. It is black. This is genius when you are talking about a DIAPER that gets poo on it all the time. No need to worry about stains!

VELCRO: Although I am a self proclaimed snap lover...I sure do love their high quality velcro when I am trying to change a wiggly boy in the middle of the night.

TUMMY PANEL: The RAB's now have an extra layer of fabric in the front of the diaper which helps for tummy sleepers and for boys (this is now something I have to think about you know). 

TWO OPENINGS: Although we typically only use our RAB's as an AI2, we have been known to use the pocket for overnight. For those of you that use it as a pocket diaper, you will love this feature. This makes it so easy to get inserts in and out!

NEW SNAP ARRANGEMENT: This time around they did away with the hip snap so now you only have two rows of snaps to work with!

And as always, Rock-a-Bums still can be used 5 different ways. Curious? They thought you might be so they posted a video explaining each one of its uses.

Clearly, Rock-A-Bums are a favorite around here. Now, make sure if you haven't already, to head on over to their giveaway!

And, because I am OBSESSED with their new prints. Let's just take one last look at them, shall we?

(from top to bottom:  blue velvet, zanadu, punk plaid green, & punk plaid pink)

Which one is your favorite? I am thinking Israel needs to be rocking some guitars...but that plaid sure would look so great on him too.

*All opinions are my own. 

Cloth Diapers: Round Two!

One more day until the big reveal! I can hardly wait! But, as promised, I am back with some more info on our 3rd year of cloth diapering. I decided to keep the party going because let's face it...I am a novelist and I just could not fit everything I needed to say into one post. Today's topic will be an overview of what we are using now. I also have a controversial post coming...it is going to shock a few people...but it needs to be said. So, yeah, that is coming later on this week!

Okay by now we all know I might as well be a hippy because let’s just be honest, I like all things natural. Cloth diapering was no exception. Now, something I have learned over the years (3.5 to be exact) is that cloth diapering is not always the easiest solution. We love it and love the benefits so much that we never wavered in our decision, but more and more I am finding people that go into cloth blindly thinking that it’s all going to be wonderful and easy. This is where I picture people holding hands and skipping through fields of daisies. Is cloth worth it? You betcha! I just think you need to know that it will take some trial and error and you may not love it right away.

Let’s start with types of diapers. There are lots of them. We started with an All-in-One system, the BumGenius Elemental. That diaper was EASY. We never had to explain how to use them to any other caregivers, they were so much like disposables. However, we aren’t using them with Israel. Why? Sadly, over time, the natural fibers broke down to the point of them being unusable. I believe this happened because we did not have a large rotation of them so the fibers naturally break down (just like any piece of clothing) and we also had some bad bleaching advice (more on that another time). The other thing to note is that with Eden, the BGE’s fit perfectly from 10 lbs all the way until she was potty trained. Unfortunately, their fit is just not as great with Israel’s body type. So, do note that different diapers fit babies differently.

So, what are we using this time? Since the BGE’s we have tried MANY different diapers. We have narrowed down our “stash” to SoftBums, RockaBums, and Grovia shells. Our system of choice? All-in-twos. The way this system works is you have a shell (the outer layer of the diaper) and an insert that attach together. When you go to change the diaper, you put the wet insert into the pail, but you keep the shell out to reuse multiple times. We fell in love with this system because it was similar to what we were used to with the all-in-one diapers, but more cost effective since you get to reuse them which means you don’t need as many shells. This was extremely important for us since we were at a place financially where we just could not afford a whole lot. We do miss the ease of our AIO’s (Josh does especially), but these are pretty awesome. Each brand has reasons why we love them. I am not going to do a review on them at this point, but if you want to hear my opinions on all the ones we have tried I would be happy to fill you in...and trust me...I have tried A LOT. 

So, the moral of the story is, one diaper does not fit all. Every time someone asks me what my favorite diaper is, I ask them what their needs are. If you are contemplating starting cloth, but don't know where to start, write a list of things that are important to use. Ease of use, cost, snaps vs. velcro, etc. Then, start asking around. Get ready for LOTS of opinions. We cloth diapering folk sure like to express our love for the brands we use. Also, if you happen to have a local cloth diaper store, ask if they do demonstrations. This is a great way to get your hands on the diapers and really see what you think. Tomorrow I will fill you in on the diaper that I feel fits all of the criteria we looked for in a diaper and why I think it's a good fit for most everyone. 

 

Israel | 2 Months

Better late than never right? Finding time to sit down and document this little guys life seems quite hard to do. He is a bundle of fun and we tend to enjoy staring at him much more than staring at a computer. This kid fits so perfectly into our family. He definitely "shook us up" a bit, but I'm learning his needs and things are much calmer now. Turns out that eating better helped our little boy out in so many ways. I am so glad we were able to find that out. 

Here is our boy now. He was 15.6 lbs in this photo and 24 inches long.

Yeah, so I chose to take his photo when he was both tired and hungry. The sun was going down. I had no other choice. Really. Besides, I thought it captured was his first two months looked like. Thankfully since then he has been the picture of happiness. 

Here is a look back at Gus from one week to two months. 

Israel,

Oh my little Gus Gus...Guster...Gusterson. We simply adore you. I keep thinking my heart has already exploded with love for you, and yet, somehow the love just grows more and more every day. You smile and have started to babble. Your favorite place is laying naked on a flat surface. That is when you are your happiest. I think you love being able to see our faces. Your sister smothers you and you are not quite tolerant of that just yet. You will learn. Bella hasn't seemed to notice your existence. I think she gave us and realized there are most likely many more babies to come. You have started to play on your play mat and will sit in your bouncer for super short amounts of time. I love that you need to touch me all the time. I wear you in the Moby many hours every day and neither of us tire of it. In fact, you started holding your head up so well in the last month and I am going to go ahead and thank babywearing for that. You still gag on pacifiers and bottles so "eating mommy's tummy" as Eden says happens every 2 hours or less. I love having a son. It is something I never knew I would say. Each day your daddy and I get more and more excited to see you grow and learn new things. Goodness I love you so. 

Love,

Your slightly obsessed mother. 

Israel | 1 Month

Everyone keeps asking me if the first month went fast. Honestly? I didn't feel like it did all that much. I think it helped that I got to have 2 weeks of rest with just Israel for the most part while I recovered from my c-section. I can't recommend that enough. It was a wonderful bonding experience with my new little guy and definitely what he and I needed. He is my little monkey...clinging to me always. 

 

I, Mallory Crain, did in fact give birth to that baby. Please be impressed. I call him my sumo baby. I am proud.

Israel,

You are the son we never knew we needed. The little boy who has stolen our hearts and then some. You have made your presence known in this house, that's for sure. You are a little man with a need for 24/7 snuggles. Everyone grants your wishes happily. We called you a high needs baby, but as it turns out, it was mommy's accidental caffeine intake that was causing your screaming fits. Now, we call you "Grumpy Gus" because honestly? You are one grumpy boy. If you aren't being held, while standing, and bouncing up and down, you tend to use your voice...a lot. Let's just say we were never worried about your lungs. We also find it sweet how you need that physical connection. I wear you in the Moby every day. Your big sister adores you. She also smothers you. I think you two are going to be close...or Eden will make you be her friend. You look like an identical copy of your daddy, but with a teensy bit of mommy thrown in for good measure. You have daddy's eyes, ears, skin color, height, fingers, and toes, but you have mommy's nose and look like her grandpa Ray. As for your growth? Oh dear boy, you don't stop growing! This is a shock after having your sister who struggled to stay on the charts. You have gained a pound a week since leaving the hospital and you have gotten so long. You LOVE to eat so I attribute that to your great size. Nights were extremely hard with you and you stayed awake almost the entire night every night. You dislike stimulation. Bouncers, play mats, toys...all of them make you angry. Israel John, you were the exact child God planned for our family and we are so thankful you are in our lives! You are one well loved little boy!

Love,

Mommy

38 Weeks | The Final Update

The very last pregnancy update is here. I am right at 38 1/2 weeks pregnant right now....I will be 39 on Thursday. The day of the scheduled c-section. I never thought I would make it to that date, and am still wondering if I will. Baby boy, you are trying hard to come out early. Ordinarily I would be just fine and dandy with that, but my doctor is out of town and we kind of sort of will have a brush with fame if he waits until Thursday. I'll give you more details on our major "famousness" (yeah I made that up) if it actually happens. Here is the thing. Last pregnancy my water broke. I never once had a contraction of my own. Had no idea what they even felt like. The doctor on call (because once again I didn't have my actual doctor) insisted we start Pitocin to reduce the likelihood of infection. I finally agreed. Pitocin contractions are the only  contractions I ever knew and I thought I would never know what "real" ones felt like since this time our baby would be born through a c-section. No need for contractions there. Ha. Ha. and HA. I have had contractions for the past month, and very strong ones I might add. Fast forward to two days ago and if I even moved I would have one. Yesterday, I put myself on bed rest knowing my doctor was out of town. I refused to time contractions until later in the night... they were 2-4 minutes apart, all lasting for a minute or so each. No one thought I would make it through the night, but thankfully, I did. The contractions kept coming all night and were pretty intense in the morning, but somehow they just died down the rest of the day. Not that they are non-existent, but I'm less worried about him coming at the moment. Honestly, if it weren't for my horribly awful experience last time that lead me to my new doctor, I would be up and walking around trying to get labor started. Sadly, due to that awful experience, I am a bit on the worried side when it comes to having a different doctor. I think it is valid. I totally know God has this in His hands so if Israel comes early I will be more than excited. I keep picturing what his little face will look like.

Oh and in ever dramatic Mallory fashion, I may have taken a trip to the hospital once already. At 37 weeks. I peed my pants. Don't ask.

I have loved being pregnant with friends. I don't want to forget that my friend Sarah and I have our c-section scheduled for the same morning. Yes, we live in two different states, but it has been fun to have that to look forward to together. Now we are both excited to see which baby comes first! I also have a friend who is being induced the day after my surgery, by the same doctor, which means we will be hospital buddies! I am so determined to have a better experience this time that I truly believe I am going to be able to get up and move around and go meet her baby girl. And, probably the most special thing I want to remember is that Israel shares the same due date as his little "cousin," Hayley. Ruby and I were both due on March 28th. Ironically, I'll be having him a week early and she had Hayley almost a week late. They won't share birthdays, but just having shared that date seems pretty special to me. 

I just cannot believe the time is here. All the planning, worrying, excitement...it all comes down to one day. Soon enough I know I will look back and wonder what life was like without our little boy even though right now I can't figure out what life will be like with him. More chaotic for sure, and yet, so much more wonderful. That I am sure of. 

Just for fun, I also want to make sure to remember some guesses we have about our little man. Eden guessed that he will have pink eyes. Let's hope she is wrong on that one. For some reason I have always pictured him as having dark hair and dark eyes. I don't know if that is because in my family I was the blondie when EVERY SINGLE OTHER PERSON in my family has black hair or what. It is just what I picture. I also think of him as having more of my brother's personality. Laid back, but still great at bugging his sister. He may end up being more of a class clown like Josh, so we will see. Eden uses up so much energy that I am not sure if we can have two highly energetic kids around. Thankfully Bella sleeps for all of us. As for size, Josh and I both feel pretty confident he will be in the upper 6 pound range. Maybe 6 lbs 10 ounces? We will see soon enough!

Alright....next time I blog about the baby it should be a picture of him!!!!! 

Israel's Baby Shower

And once again, I am so blessed by my friends and family. I was most certainly not expecting a baby shower for the second baby, let alone such a large one, but wow am I so thankful! It was a perfect event pulled off perfectly by two very important people in my life, Ruby and Kirsten. They did a fantastic job making it the perfect day that fit my personality exactly. I actually knew nothing about the shower. The only thing I asked of the girls was that they make it as stress free on themselves as possible. I don't think they listened, but hey, I tried. Either way, I had so much fun and have so many great memories from that day. I didn't get many photos..and definitely not any good quality ones. I tried to snap as many as possible, but in the end, decided having conversations with all those I treasure was much more important. So, sorry for the quality, but you'll get the idea. 

I'll have to post photos of the blocks once I get them. This was such a cute activity! I'm not a girl who likes games, so this was perfectly perfect. Each guest made a block and they all turned out so cute and unique. Seriously, I can't wait to get a closer look of them!

And um hi, that view?! I would never grow tired of that view. I take photos each time I visit this location...I cannot get enough.

Ruby. Me. Kirsten. Love those two more than they will probably ever realize. So thankful for their friendship and the fact that I am able to be so real with them. Seriously, they haven't given up on me yet despite the fact that they get to experience just how crazy I really am. 

Despite the shower being right in the middle of Eden's nap time, I couldn't imagine her not being there. She had so much fun, despite the few meltdowns at the end.

Eden LOVES her Uncle Brett. As you can tell, she has a whole lot of fun with him. This was the most serious photo we could get of the three of us. The dirty knee is an indicator of just how much fun she had...

First pair of Jordan's, lovingly given by Uncle Brett and Aunt Stephanie. Perks of Nike employees. I can't wait to put these on Israel's little feet.

I have extremely talented friends. If you want the CUTEST baby things ever check out East&El. Ashley is amazing. 

Oh and best surprise of all? Our stroller! A bunch of friends and family went in on our double stroller and ended up also gifting us with the carseat attachment AND the rocker for our bassinet. Blessed. That's what I am. Don't worry, I'll post photos of the stroller as soon as we can take our little man out for some strolls! We did take Eden on a test drive, and yep...we are in love. The bassinet stand is happily sitting next to our bed, waiting to be occupied by a teeny tiny baby. Hurry it up little man! 

35 Weeks | Almost Done!

I just cannot believe we are at exactly one month until our C-section date. I also cannot believe that technically he can be here ANY DAY. I go back and forth on being ready, but for now I feel very ready for him to come. Although tomorrow I might get nervous again about the reality of it all.

I lost my nesting drive last week and it drove me crazy. I had ZERO energy. May have also had something to do with my low iron levels. I'm back to my normal insane nesting self and I feel so much more normal. We needed to get a lot accomplished...not much that was baby related necessarily, but trying to get the rest of our boxes purged, sorted, and re-packed. I know packing with a newborn won't be fun, so we are trying to be ahead of the game for whenever that day comes. I am loving clearing out all of our stuff. It has been so refreshing and I think will help me stay relaxed a little more with two kids. Currently our lives are a BIT on the crazy side (that's an extreme exaggeration) so any sort of calm during the chaos is welcomed with open arms. 

Eden is getting so excited about her baby brother. Whenever I doubt that she fully understands, she ends up amazing us with her comprehension. She practices putting brother to sleep in his bouncer (she also practices putting herself to sleep in there...). One unfortunate event is the amount of times we find her sneaking into Israel's crib. The girl is going to smother that baby. She is a sneaky one. 

Either way, we are ready. And even if we weren't, we better be. I had braxton hicks contractions with Eden, but what I am experiencing with him is something completely different. These hurt. Like, stop and breath through them painful. I get them at all sorts of times, but a lot when I am walking and a lot in the middle of the night. It's okay, sleep is non-existent anyway. I have to pee every five minutes. It is obnoxious. Good thing I am someone who works just fine without sleep. The only complaints I have right now are mostly just dealing with my back...and wearing clothes. My back is in pain non-stop and clothes just exaggerate the pain. Otherwise, this pregnancy has been so much better than I expected and I am so thankful for a mostly drama free last pregnancy. 

Hopefully I'll get to update one more time before the little man makes his debut!

The Big Three Zero

I decided my favorite thing about being pregnant is the nesting. Wow, do I ever get a lot accomplished during this nesting phase. It's my favorite. I have organized every corner of every room we have (which is only 2 bedrooms, a bathroom, and a living room), but I am excited. I get rid of everything and I clean everything and it feels amazing. I hear adopting mama's nest today and I sure hope that's true because my best work happens when babies are coming...otherwise our house will be perpetually messy after Israel is born (yeah that is going to happen no matter what I do). 

The bad news in pregnancy? My hormones are off the wall insane. I don't feel like myself. I find myself totally losing my cool over the craziest little things. Granted, there is a lot of stress in our lives at the moment, but seriously I do not like the way I am acting. I am getting up every morning and spending some time in God's word to try to help shape my attitude for the day. The fact that my crazy nesting keeps me awake until ridiculous hours of the night probably isn't helping me at all. I am overwhelmed, but that is no excuse for attacking my loved ones so much these last couple of weeks. 

I just want Israel to be here.

32 weeks pregnant means 7 weeks or less until this baby arrives. Yes, I am very late in posting this 30 week update, but you expected that right? Crazy that I'll only be posting 2 more updates I would guess before the little stud makes his debut. I'm starting to really think he will here sooner than the scheduled c-section date. I mean, does anyone seriously believe that I will walk in at a perfectly scheduled time and have this baby right when I expect to? If you know me you know NOTHING happens according to my perfectly planned schedule. Despite my best efforts. The good news is I am neurotic and have had the infant car seat cleaned and ready to install for weeks (yes I kept myself from installing it), his bassinet and crib are ready, the hospital bags MIGHT already have some items in it, his clothes are cleaned and put away..I mean seriously, he could come today (please don't buddy...it's not safe) and we would be more than ready. Okay, obviously I still have a giant list of things I would love to do, but hey, a baby trumps the perfect organized house any day. 

Oh, and Saturday was my baby shower! It was so beyond perfect. Can't wait to share more details! 

Rock The Bump

So, it's time for me to give up on ever seeing my photos from my old computer again (sorry 5 week photo) and move on. I mean seriously...the baby will be here in just over 2 months and I haven't posted any bump photos. I've been documenting this pregnancy, just haven't put them out for the rest of the world.

This pregnancy we decided to do a photo every 5 weeks. Sadly, I missed week 25, but instead of throwing a fit, we just documented week 28. No harm done. For Eden I did updates for almost every doctor appointment, but now I feel like there's not much to say. Israel is growing the way he should and this pregnancy has been relatively easy for me. I am okay with that. 

Last Friday we had an appointment with our doctor. The appointment where you get poked and prodded like crazy...you know the one. Peeing in a cup (my new doctor doesn't make you do them until week 28! Love that), glucose test (more on that later), Rhogam shot (for those of us who are RH-), blood work, and then a culture of an infection I have had for a month and a half. I felt violated. Other than that, so far everything looks great!

I really want to do a post on having a natural pregnancy. I am very passionate about it and have been able to reap the benefits of a much easier pregnancy which I think is due to the choices I made before getting pregnant and during pregnancy. One of those choices happens to be my rejection of the glucose drink. Yep, I said no to the chemical filled sugary substance we all know and love :::insert sarcasm::: I'll explain why I chose to reject it and what I did instead when I write more about having a natural pregnancy...because let's face it..there's a whole lot of babies coming into the world lately. 

Now time to show off my ever growing giganticness. Don't worry, I'm totally cool with it. I like that he is growing big and strong in there. Even if it hurts. A lot. The days of peeing every 10 minutes is upon me. 

And..I just realized that more of my photos were on my old computer. FAIL. Deep frustration happening over here. I'll just have to add those later on I suppose. And wow, what a difference 8 weeks made for that boy. No wonder I am uncomfortable and can't reach my feet. Maybe I should mention that I'm too cheap to buy maternity pants so I squeeze myself into unbuttoned and unzipped jeans and want to cry by the end of the day? Yep. Even if I would spend the money, they just don't make my size. Such is the life of a small person I suppose. And whoa. The hair. Someone find me some scissors and chop it off. I mentioned heading to Great Clips the other day, but I hear their prices aren't that great. Um....seriously?! Josh may be cutting my mangy hair off. 

Let me not forget the most important thing. Our c-section was officially scheduled! I'm so not celebrating the c-section, but it is fun to know that officially, on March 21, unless he decides to come sooner, Israel will be in our arms! Yes, this overwhelms me. Most everything does. I've had a few people ask why we are doing a c-section. Here's a brief overview. I delivered Eden, she came out fine, and then I passed out. Didn't really happen like that, but you can read Part 1 and Part 2 of our birth story to understand what happened (if you are squeamish about blood maybe don't read it...just know it was bad). Anyway, after not being told anything by the doctors at the clinic I had been at, doing my own research, and meeting with a new doctor...I figured out that what happened to me was NOT OKAY and was pretty much caused by doctor error. By pretty much, I mean it was. However, without proof (none of this was written in my file after delivery) we don't know for sure what happened. This causes me to be a high risk. So, my dreams of delivering with a midwife and birthing completely naturally were shot. After three talks with my new doctor we all agreed that for me, the safest way to deliver this baby was through a c-section. I know the controversies, I agree they are overused, but I am staying confident in my doctor's wisdom. This will be our last pregnancy (unless God works some miracles) so we are praying that everything will go smoothly. I actually have a plan to make this feel a bit more natural despite the fact that it's a surgery. I am presenting it to my doctor at my next appointment and praying that she and the hospital will be receptive to it. We will see.

Anyway, that's enough blabbing about my little boy. Hope you enjoyed seeing a large belly on your screen ;)

A Little More About Israel

Time for me to introduce you all to Israel. He's obviously not here yet, but I haven't had a chance to really chat about our baby boy yet. Plus I may have promised a reveal video to you all, and we may have been unable to use internet in our hotel, so I may have been harassed a few too many times for not posting it sooner....

Let me just say I have felt like the baby inside me was a boy the whole time. It was weird. I had no reason to really think it would be, but I just KNEW we were having a boy. Ironically, Josh truly believed we would have four girls. Of course when we found out it was a boy, most said (innocently I'm sure) how Josh was probably so excited to have "his boy." To us we don't see it that way. Neither of us have ever cared what our babies were. We just feel blessed to be able to have these babies and know that God had our family planned out long before we even thought about it. So, despite what people think, while we are over the moon excited that we are having a boy, we would have been overly excited to have a girl as well. We don't believe that because we have a boy and a girl we have a "perfect" family. I am sure those that have all boys or all girls certainly don't think their family isn't perfect. When we go to adopt we will not specify gender. Just as we don't have a say in who joins our family through pregnancy, we will let God decide who will join our family through adoption. Sorry, just wanted to be clear that our babies are very important to us no matter what gender :)

Seeing this boy on the ultrasound was the best feeling. With Eden we had sooooo many ultrasounds for many different reasons and this time around we haven't had any complications that require an ultrasound so we happily waited 19 weeks to see our little boy. By happily I mean we were bursting at the seams to see our baby's sweet face, but were happy that we didn't have a reason to see him sooner. Thankfully the ultrasound tech that we had was gracious and looked at the gender first thing. For Eden we had to wait until the very last minute! Josh and I both can read ultrasounds fairly well (since we had a lot of practice last time) so we knew it would be obvious to us if we were having a boy or girl. It certainly was obvious. I have no doubts that we have a little boy coming. After that ultrasound we had to prepare for our reveal video to our family. We made ourselves wait an agonizing 9 days to reveal it to the rest of the world since we were determined to announce from Disneyland. We had also picked out a pair of shoes at Nordstrom for a boy or a girl so we ran over to pick up our cute little boy Adidas (I'll have to share a photo of them...they are adorable). We quickly worked on our reveal video so we could send it off to family at 6 p.m. on the dot. It was the first video I have ever made and if you haven't heard me say so, I am quite proud of it. Without making you wait longer, here is the link to watch the video. Crossing my fingers that it works...Josh promises that it will...

WATCH ME!

We are seriously so in love with this little boy. 

Every name that we choose has to have meaning. I think that's probably true for most. It is so scary choosing a name for a baby that they will have to live with the rest of their lives. We had prayed over names and had a boy and a girl name picked out before we were pregnant (come on..you know me by now..). Let's just say, Israel was not the name we had picked. In fact, it wasn't even in the running. The story of the name is this, Josh was working one day and a little boy named Israel came in. He chatted with him and texted me saying he LOVED the name. We chatted more about it and he said he felt like it was the perfect name for our son. Um, excuse me?! We had the perfect name for our son! I liked the name, but it just wasn't what I had planned on. I prayed, hard. The answer quickly came to me...if Josh felt so confident that this was the name for our future son, then that was the name. So, our other name is now ready for another boy if God should choose to bless us with another son and I have no doubts that Israel is the perfect name for our baby.

The name Israel means "God perseveres." What a beautiful and strong name. For us, we couldn't think of a better name for our baby to carry the rest of his life. We pray that he will understand it's importance. 

His middle name was one we chose long ago. John was not only one of the twelve apostles of Jesus, but that name also belongs to Josh's grandpa. We like to choose middle names that honor a family member. Eden's honored my grandpa, while Israel's honors a grandpa of Josh's. We love the combination of the two names. 

I have so much more we could share...and one of these days when I get my computer files recovered from my old computer I'll be able to share my bump photos that we have been taking. One of these days I'll get them back...

Thank you all for your sweet words about our baby boy. We so appreciate all the excitement you all have for us! We can't wait until we can see his face...because seriously if his ultrasound photo was any indication, he is one handsome little boy. And I am obviously not biased one bit. 

Love you all!

*The DIY Surprise Lantern used in the reveal video came from the blog, Oh Happy Day. 

It's a....

BOY!!!!!!

Can't wait to meet you Israel John Crain!

We will post a video of our reveal later :) We are so excited!

Some Baby Drama

*Fair warning...this is the world's longest post with only one photo. If you want to hear about some emotional stuff we are going through with the baby then please proceed. 

So I had every intention of doing a happy post answering all the questions everyone had as well as talk more about how we found out we were expecting and all of that fun stuff. Unfortunately, due to my annoying computer issues in which my old computer is holding onto my photos and because I know many are anxious to hear about what we are "dealing with" right now (we had some unfortunate news I guess you could say after my initial doctor visit) I am going to start with an explanation of that and then do a nice happy post about our precious little one. 

Nemo was the first thing we bought for this baby. We were at the Disney store with tears in our eyes because we are freaks up in Washington shortly after finding out about being pregnant and really wanted the first thing for the baby to be something Disney. Read: we are Disney nuts. Fact..I grew up 20 minutes away from the Mouse himself and can safely say I have been to Disneyland over 50 times. I love that place. Anyway, we browsed around and nothing was screaming "I am the perfect gender neutral baby gift." We finally happened upon the stuffed animals and we both zeroed in on Nemo. We love that little guy. I didn't realize that Nemo was going to be a symbolic thing for me later on in the pregnancy. I'll explain that in a bit.

We went to our first doctor appointment on September 8. We had that date etched in our minds and were so excited for that appointment. For some silly reason I have been extra anxious about this baby. I guess a lot of it had to do with the fact that we knew this was my last pregnancy since my body and pregnancy don't really do well together plus I have watched a lot of friends go through miscarriages lately and so I guess I just kept thinking God would decide I wasn't meant to have this one. I know I'm supposed to be anxious about nothing, but I let the thoughts get to me. I wasn't overly obsessed, but my heart and mind weren't in the right place. Thankfully I had awesome prayer warriors that helped so much and by the time I got to the appointment I wasn't anxious at all...I knew that no matter what, heartbeat or no heartbeat, God blessed me with a baby, even if only for a short time. Of course all that anxiety was for nothing (except teaching me a whole lot of lessons) because we did hear that tiny heartbeat and it was the best sound I've ever heard. I was giddy and couldn't stop smiling and laughing...so much so that my doctor couldn't count the beats. Josh thought it was 138 so we shall see. I got my initial blood work done that appointment..left almost passing out every chance I got...but the appointment was done and I was elated. 

Fast forward to Wednesday of the next week. This was 5 days after our appointment. I was in the bathroom getting ready and Eden had been playing with my phone. I picked it up and realized I had a missed call from an unknown number. I knew it was my doctor. The funny thing is I figured I would hear the words "you are low on iron" since I had forgotten that I was supposed to start supplementing with iron during pregnancy. So, I quickly dialed the number so they could tell me that and I could go back to my day. That's not at all what I heard. Iron was never used in that conversation. The nurse who had called said, "you had an abnormal result in your blood work." Again, I am just waiting to hear all about my iron count. "You tested positive as a cystic fibrosis carrier." Excuse me, WHAT?! I didn't even know that was a possibility! Somehow I stayed level headed..asked her what the next steps were..and promised I would call her back once we got the next part figured out (I'll explain that in a second). I hung up. Josh was giving Eden a bath upstairs so I walked up, still feeling okay, and the second I opened the door I fell over in sobs. It wasn't the words "cystic fibrosis" that got me at that moment, because honestly as much as I thought I knew what it was, I really had no clue. It was the pure shock. I have had a baby already. No one told me this. We would have rethought trying for baby number two if we thought this was a possibility. 

The next step was for Josh to get a blood test to determine if he too is a carrier. We had no idea this was  going to be so complicated. It was a full week of phone calls, tears, frustrations, and serious advocating for our baby. Josh doesn't have conventional insurance since he is Native American and we had never had to deal with it before so we had no idea what to expect. Honestly though, now I can look back and realize that somehow having us both advocating so passionately for this baby we have never met brought us closer to each other and closer to our baby. No one was going to tell me they couldn't help this child. Mama bear came out in full force. 

Finally, after lots of help from my nurse at my doctors office (seriously..you'll be hearing lots of raves about my new doctor...I love her and her staff SO MUCH) Josh was able to get tested yesterday. It will probably be another week (or at this rate WEEKS) before we find out the answer. 

Here is what I know. The chances of Josh also being a carrier are quite low. However, I like to point back at the fact that we had no idea cystic fibrosis was somewhere in my family (it is genetic). It is mostly found in people originating from Northern European countries. With me being one quarter Filipino and Josh being 1/123345666777 Native American (seriously though he hardly qualifies) I figured my chances would be better than his to not have it! So, while many are trying to make us feel better by saying the chances are low, I don't look at it that way. There's a reason why I don't gamble...odds are always against me. Now, the baby can only have cystic fibrosis if both parents are carriers. If Josh isn't a carrier then both our kids could have a chance of being a carrier, but that's it (they will both want to get tested along with their spouses before having children). Here's the next part to that which will explain why Eden does not have cystic fibrosis even if Josh is a carrier...there is a 25% chance that the baby would have cystic fibrosis if both parents are carriers. So, yes the odds are in our favor. But, obviously there are people with cystic fibrosis so to me its not a done deal that our baby won't have it. 

I explain it like this. Each parent has two genes they give to their child. Parents who don't have cystic fibrosis give their child 2 good genes and all is well. In our case I have one good gene and one bad gene. If Josh is a carrier he will also have one good gene and one bad gene (if we had both bad then we would have c.f.). If he doesn't he has 2 good genes. Our baby could then get one bad and one good (thus would be a carrier), two bads (would have c.f.), or two goods (not a carrier and doesn't have c.f.). Not scientific I am sure but it helps me explain it. 

So, next step. We wait for Josh's test results. If he tests positive we will then meet with a Perinatologist in Portland and learn more and decide if he want to do further testing. Our answer will be no. We do not believe Amniocentesis (which is how they test) is a safe test for us. Instead, we will proceed believing that our baby has it so we can prepare as best we can. Then, if our baby is born with c.f. we feel a bit more prepared for the life that is ahead of us. If not, then we have lots of knowledge, but don't need to use it! No matter what this baby is God's blessing to us. If our baby has c.f. then God obviously believed we were the right parents to take care of the baby. We feel confident that we can do it. The silly thing...I'm most worried that I won't know how to say the "right words." I feel like there is a right way to talk about children with different abilities and I know I'll mess it all up. Definitely something I'll be praying hard about. 

We feel blessed by this baby already. We had already discussed being open to special needs adoption so why wouldn't we love our baby no matter what? We are ready to get some results and move forward. It's been a frustratingly long week. 

So, back to Nemo. I started thinking about the fact that Nemo was born with a disability. He had a small fin. And yet, that didn't stop him at all. I just found it so ironic that we were looking at possibly having a baby that may not get to live the life we would have planned for him/her, but I doubt that'll keep our child from doing great things. Who does what their parents planned for them anyway?! So, feel free to make fun of me for my comparison, Josh did, but to me it was something that helped me. 

If any of you made it through this post, congratulations!!!! We appreciate all of your prayers and support...we have felt every bit of a it. Can't wait to tell you more about this precious baby that we are kind of obsessed with. We even made our first "big" purchase for the baby! 

Wondering what Cystic Fibrosis is, here is a link to more info. 

"God is our refuge and strength,

an ever-present help in trouble.

Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way

and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,

though its waters roar and foam

and the mountains quake with their surging." 

Psalm 46: 1-3

**I tried to add comments back to my posts, but so far I don't seem to be successful. I have a fear they are gone forever :(  I had gotten rid of them because I realized my focus became on how many comments I was receiving and forgetting that this blog was really meant for us and those that wanted to keep up with our crazy family. I feel like it no longer hinders me and yet apparently I can't get them back. If you feel the need to comment you are always welcome to email me at thecrainsnest[at]gmail[dot]com. 

Coming March 2013

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY EDEN, YOU'RE GOING TO BE A BIG SISTER!"

More details to come!

Project 52:14 | Perfection

Yeah so in case you haven't noticed I am flat out obsessed with my new "niece" and can't stop talking about her, let alone blogging about her. I mean, hello...she is adorable. My other two beautiful nieces live in another state so I haven't gotten to love on them as much as I wish I could. So, Hayley is getting to deal with me now. 

I was a total camera happy crazy auntie at the hospital (would you expect anything less??). I even got to be there while the proud parents were taking little Miss Gorgeous home. As I was snapping away I started to think about how babies are so untainted by the world. I mean, look at her. She is so very innocent. She doesn't yet know about the scary things in this world. It would be so easy to protect our littles from evil, but in the end I know that keeping them from ever seeing evil means they will never know how to help others. I do absolutely want Eden to stay innocent and young as long as possible. I want her only concerns to be what color crayon she will color with next. And then...when the day comes for her to step out in the world and witness those that are hurting, those that are not kind...I pray that she will be able to imitate the love of Christ and strive to be like Him. And when the temptation to be "perfect" in the eyes of the world arises, I pray that she will always see herself as beautiful, a child of God, that will always be loved IN SPITE OF her imperfections. True beauty is within and I pray that all children can see that as they face the criticism of the world. 

For more Project 52 goodness, check out these fine blogs:

styleberry BLOG, Lucas and Mahina, Wicked Kate, The Mog Blog, Dana Moran Photography

Let me know if you want to join in on the fun! It's never too late to start your Project 52 :)

She Is Here!

Our "niece" and "cousin" made her debut on Monday night! She is absolutely beautiful and I am so ridiculously in love with that girl. Sadly I'm the only one who has met her in this household cause the rest of the family is sick. It's seriously an infirmary in here. Anyway here she is! All 9 lbs 6 oz and 21 inches of her.

Pink + Gray Nursery Reveal

The moment you have all been waiting for is here...Hayley's room reveal!

Just a quick catch up for those that haven't been reading along. I am not pregnant. I wish I was, but it looks like that's not in the plans right now. Really I just have baby fever from all of you cute pregnant gals and your cute little babies. However, our wonderfully wonderful friends Daniel and Ruby ARE expecting a baby..a girl...like any day now. Around these parts Daniel and Ruby are referred to as the besties, BFF's, and "Uncle Dan" and "Aunt Ruby." That's just how we roll. Wow, I am just on a tangent today. Let's get to it, shall we?

Entering Hayley's nursery...

inspiration

So, what do you think?! This was most definitely a labor of love for a little girl who is already so loved. We honestly can't wait until she gets here so we can see her enjoying her new space. I mean seriously, she's got to be excited to get out of her current cramped corners right? Hayley, are you listening?!

I don't think I'll ever grow tired of seeing a space go from a simple idea to actual reality. It amazes me every time. I love that Daniel and Ruby gave me a lot of "creative control" and yet I would say they were some serious hard workers getting this done. They like to act all humble like they did nothing, but seriously they worked hard on their daughter's room. I will say one thing...I think we all agree that when you are pregnant, limiting the DIY is a good thing. I am pretty sure Ruby said that at one point. We had a LOT of DIY going on (many inspired by Pinterest of course) and well, Ruby, being the overachiever she is (seriously that girl can do more in a day than I can in an entire year, girl's got skills) decided to take on a bunch of projects. I loved her enthusiasm, but worried for her safety. All is well, she survived and from the looks on their faces I would say they are actually happy with the room. Good thing, cause that was our goal. So thank you to two of the greatest friends out there for trusting us enough to help design your baby's nursery. And thank you to my partner-in-crime...the hubsters...for the five million trips over to the house to install yet another shelf, paint another wall, and answer another mathematical question. That guy rocked it. AND thank you to all of you lovely readers for actually believing in me and pushing me to get these photos taken so you could see it. I was a little worried, but hey the only opinions that mattered were those of the parents (and baby of course!).

So do you like it? Anything in particular you have questions about? I'll try to remain respectful of Daniel and Ruby's privacy, but if you do have questions please don't hesitate to ask! Anyone notice that we kind of are pushing Hayley to become a reader....the girl's got no chance.

 *I'm hoping to update the photos as we finish a few things up. The gallery wall will be finished once Hayley makes her debut. The frame around Hayley's name is being touched up so the strange glimmer you see is just some unfinished painting that needs to be done...actually it may already have been at this point. 


**I'm also hoping to either A) Happen upon a new lens so that I can get crisper photos or B) Take some photos in the earlier hours when the sun is on that side of the house to get some better shots. This may help show that the walls are all in fact the same shade of gray. Sadly, the kit lens had a bit of a hard time capturing everything perfectly, but it got the job done, what more could we ask? 

The Making Of An Announcement

There has been something Eden has been wanting to say for awhile, but we had to wait to share the news (Okay no people..it has nothing to do with her becoming a big sister so just stop it). 

Translation: I'm going to be a cousin!!!! 

Eden received this special onesie from her adopted aunt and uncle, Ruby and Daniel a couple months ago. To say we were excited would be the understatement of the century. In fact, Josh and I literally couldn't sleep that night following their announcement because all we could do is talk about their baby. Honestly, it felt like we were having another child, that is just how excited we get about our best friends having their first baby. I think it made it extra special since we now know what it is like to see that 'positive' on the stick. I am really hoping she never shows anyone the video that she recorded of us finding out because honestly we acted like loonies. Okay fine, I was the only looney one there. 

So, this post actually gets even more exciting. No people, Ruby and I are not pregnant together...and in fact we technically can't even think about another little one until Eden is at least 18 months...this means NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. Alright, now on to the exciting stuff. Daniel and Ruby asked ME to take photos for them to announce their pregnancy to everyone. No pressure or anything. The only photos I take are of Eden and inanimate objects that can't tell me how horrible I am at photography. The scary thing is, Daniel and Ruby can talk...crazy as that may be. Of course I couldn't say no, I mean they are family to us and I just cannot say no to family. So, I did it. And I was so very honored. Want to see?

 

Yes, these are the same, I just liked the processing of the second one so I had to include it. Oh and um, hello cute puppy! That is Stella...yes it rhymes with Bella. I think they should name their child "Aiden" so Eden doesn't feel left out (I couldn't come up with something that rhymed better...).

Also, if I had the time I would include some outtakes from my photo session with Eden. Trying to get that girl to sit still so I could get a clear photo of her onesie was asking a whole lot of her apparently. It ended with her climbing up the ottoman, and whining at me when she got stuck. Maybe I'll get those posted for fun one of these days, but today is not that day. I have to go get packed because I, my friends, am going on a retreat with the ladies of our church! Yes, the first time being away from Eden overnight. Actually its overnight times two. So, time to prepare and then snuggle with the monkey a whole lot to make up for lost time. 

Hope you all enjoy your weekend!