Israel | 1 Month

Everyone keeps asking me if the first month went fast. Honestly? I didn't feel like it did all that much. I think it helped that I got to have 2 weeks of rest with just Israel for the most part while I recovered from my c-section. I can't recommend that enough. It was a wonderful bonding experience with my new little guy and definitely what he and I needed. He is my little monkey...clinging to me always. 

 

I, Mallory Crain, did in fact give birth to that baby. Please be impressed. I call him my sumo baby. I am proud.

Israel,

You are the son we never knew we needed. The little boy who has stolen our hearts and then some. You have made your presence known in this house, that's for sure. You are a little man with a need for 24/7 snuggles. Everyone grants your wishes happily. We called you a high needs baby, but as it turns out, it was mommy's accidental caffeine intake that was causing your screaming fits. Now, we call you "Grumpy Gus" because honestly? You are one grumpy boy. If you aren't being held, while standing, and bouncing up and down, you tend to use your voice...a lot. Let's just say we were never worried about your lungs. We also find it sweet how you need that physical connection. I wear you in the Moby every day. Your big sister adores you. She also smothers you. I think you two are going to be close...or Eden will make you be her friend. You look like an identical copy of your daddy, but with a teensy bit of mommy thrown in for good measure. You have daddy's eyes, ears, skin color, height, fingers, and toes, but you have mommy's nose and look like her grandpa Ray. As for your growth? Oh dear boy, you don't stop growing! This is a shock after having your sister who struggled to stay on the charts. You have gained a pound a week since leaving the hospital and you have gotten so long. You LOVE to eat so I attribute that to your great size. Nights were extremely hard with you and you stayed awake almost the entire night every night. You dislike stimulation. Bouncers, play mats, toys...all of them make you angry. Israel John, you were the exact child God planned for our family and we are so thankful you are in our lives! You are one well loved little boy!

Love,

Mommy

Easter 2013

Easter is by far the most important holiday to me. Not my favorite to decorate for, but that's not really what Easter is about anyway. Although I believe it is important to celebrate our Savior every day, I really appreciate having that one day to truly celebrate what He has done for us. Jesus died for me. That is huge. I do not ever want to forget what He has done for me.

This year I had to forego the usual Easter festivities and traditions so that Israel and I could continue to rest and recover at home. Josh was able to take Eden to our church's annual Easter egg hunt...which she thoroughly enjoyed. On Sunday I was able to head up the stairs (something I have only done twice since being home) and enjoy a meal with the family, egg painting with Eden, and an egg hunt on the front lawn. I missed church greatly, but was thankful for our "home church" where we played a couple videos from the Jesus Storybook Bible for Eden and then watched last year's sermon from David Platt. Speaking of him, if you want to be challenged in a major way, listen to his series on James. Each sermon was amazing. 

Now on to some photos of my sweet babies...

I seriously love these two. They confirm that I want a big family each and every day. 

Her hair kills me. 

Nothing better than my two babies out in the sunshine. 

I haven't been able to take all the photos I want of the littlest Crain due to being confined to the couch 24/7...although I have been blowing up Instagram...but I did manage to sneak a few photos after a diaper change earlier today. He changes so much each day. Oh my goodness I love this kid so much. 

Can I be honest with you all? My mama heart is struggling this week. I bonded with Israel immediately. This is all thanks to a fabulous birth experience...which has been written, I just need to finish it up and add some photos. Obviously I am thankful for this, but there is one thing that has been bothering me. I have noticed a little bit of fear creeping in. The biggest one came during his three very heavy spit up episodes where he choked and had trouble breathing. It was extremely scary each time and in fact Josh and I took turns checking on him throughout the night last night. I try to be strong and remember that Israel, while entrusted into my care, is truly God's child. And yet...I broke. I saw him struggling to breathe, and I completely lost all sense. I bawled. I have known him for 9 months in my tummy and 11 days out in the world, and yet I feel like he has been a part of me forever. I am usually pretty calm about these things, but something in me snapped. I know this is "normal," but it pains me all the same.

I am so thankful for our two babies. They both add something into our family that is unique and fun and perfect. I know there are many tough days ahead, but I do not want to lose sight of the blessings we have.